Fear of the dark in children is normal: here are the causes and how to overcome it.
It happens that small children are afraid of the dark: it is an absolutely normal fear.
The causes of fear of the dark in children
The fear of the dark, so present and intense in young children, is actually an ancient and ancestral fear. The darkness, in fact, is linked to the idea of the unknown, of something that is unknown and that could hide pitfalls and dangers. Light, on the other hand, conveys an idea of joy, knowledge and life, as opposed to darkness.
In young children, darkness is associated with the fear of abandonment and separation from parents; moreover, due to their strong imagination, they bring the darkness back to the presence of monsters and terrible creatures. Children are suggestible. After watching a violent cartoon or hearing a story about witches or ghosts, they can manifest a very intense fear. From this point of view, even if the reason for the fear does not really exist - because it may be imagined, however, the child's emotions are absolutely real . For this reason it is important to take seriously all the feelings and emotions that children exhibit, including fear of the dark.
How does fear of the dark manifest itself?
Fear can manifest itself especially in the evening, after sunset. As the day draws to a close, children may be more restless and fearful. Even children who have been cheerful and full of energy during the day can change their attitude and darken when it gets dark.
The child manifests the fear of the dark in different ways:
throwing tantrums ; refusing to go to bed; assuming "childish" attitudes compared to his age, or starting to cry . Furthermore, the child does not want to leave his mother, struggles to fall asleep, wakes up several times at night, wants to sleep in the bed with his parents.
The implicit request underlying these attitudes is often nothing more than a request for attention and closeness on the part of the parents, in particular the mother when the children are very young (generally up to 3 years old).
How to overcome this fear?
There are so many ways to face and overcome fear of the dark as calmly as possible. But before moving on to more practical remedies, it is good to remember that the child must first of all be reassured and protected. When the baby is scared, the mother's voice picking him up and reassuring him is all he really needs.
Attitudes and mocking words of fear of the child are absolutely to be avoided. Even just saying: “you're grown up now”, or “you shouldn't be afraid of the dark anymore at your age”, or “there are no evil monsters and dinosaurs”, is wrong. In this way the child will feel guilty, and his discomfort, along with the fears, will increase rather than extinguish; on the contrary, the child's feelings must always be respected. What you can do is communicate and talk to him, so that he can express his fears, learn about his emotions and give them a name.
On the contrary, the child's feelings must always be respected. What you can do is communicate and talk to him, so that he can express his fears, learn about his emotions and give them a name.
Some precautions against the fear of the dark
There are some small tricks that can help with the fear of the dark. In particular, children appreciate having a small light next to the bed, so as not to be completely in the dark. But you can also have soft lights, at low intensity, throughout the room: the child will sleep in an environment that is never completely dark. Children, especially if they are small, love to go to bed after hearing a story . This is a small ritual that should be encouraged . Being told a known story reassures the child , because he knows how it will end, and he knows the characters (the "good ones" and the "bad ones"). By combining the two devices, it is possible to read a fairy tale together with the light still on , and then turn it off only once the child has fallen asleep .
Another way to reassure the child is to apply luminous stickers to the ceiling and walls, such as the classic adhesive fluorescent stars; the child will not only love them and will be reassured by the light they emanate, but will remain looking at them all before falling asleep. The transitional object should not be forgotten : it can be a soft toy or a small blanket, an old t-shirt; in short, every child has one. It is an object with a great emotional value that will help the child to deal with his fear.
Finally, one way to help the child overcome his fear of the dark is to leave the bedroom door open . The child will feel that he is closer to his parents. And if he wakes up in fear anyway, he can go to their bed and sleep with them .
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